Rejected From The Onion:

No Time To Write A Headline; I’ll Explain In The Car

The Following is a News-In-Brief headline that was rejected from my Onion packet. Feel free to laugh at or with it all you like

Tulsa, OK — Hey! Get in the car now, and buckle up, because there’s no time for a headline. It’s a crazy life-and-death situation out there that you’ve got to see for yourself, so…